Systemic Works, for me

February 2016

For centuries, people from all sorts have been asking important questions to move away from daily, mundane, life. Looking for language to suit the experience. When, years ago, I started studying the Systemic way of thinking, started by Bert Hellinger, I found some words and some answers. Words that only now start really making sense.

When I try to explain how I work from a systemic point of view, I use the hanging mobile as a metaphor. A hanging mobile is constructed to take advantage of the principle of equilibrium. A Family or Organizational system always seems to seek a certain balance.  And as Jade Oakley, artist of life-size mobiles in Australia (see visual to this post) puts it; ‘when I make a mobile each element is ‘pushed’ to the point where it is most unstable, and most beautiful. Only when the elements have reached their ‘tipping point’ does the artwork take on a kind of magic, a sense of effortless levitation in space’.

From a systemic point of view, I am somewhere in the mobile. And so are all my relatives. If I picture past generations behind me as I walk my walk of life, there is so much ‘behind me’. Generations of English, Dutch, German and Jewish people are all part of who I am. Aggressors, victims and war yet also the peaceful English countryside, entrepreneurs, game keepers and intellectuals. The history of my family is very diverse and was for a long time, confusing. As far as I can remember, I have always looked for a relaxed point where what I plan meets what I think I am supposed to be doing with what’s is emerging in my life.

Using family and organizational constellations as a method has been helpful to no end. It was insightful and sometimes even beyond a mental comprehension. It is healing at an emotional and even physical level. And now my history works as a bedding on which I can further grow. All ugliness and beauty combined, I understand so much better who I am and what I can add to the world as it is today, in this generation and within my sphere of influence.  Understanding my history in the context of today makes me want to venture out more to that ‘Tipping Point’ and feel that effortlessness.

Last week, I spoke to an old colleague and dear friend who told me he was ‘naturally confused’ about where life was taking him in business. What an interesting way of putting it. Naturally confused is a contradiction in terms and yet so well said. Sometimes, stopping to catch your breath and moving your head around just slightly, to see what is behind you, can help put things into perspective.

So, if you are interested in the systemic way of working, or would like to experience a constellation yourself, contact me. I can help you further.

(NB – alternatively, as my 11-year-old daughter puts it; ‘mummy, we don’t need history. There is nothing there that we need in my future. Things are going to be far different’.)